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Our culture has many occasions to show appreciation to those we work with and learn from: Boss's Day, Secretaries Day, Teacher Appreciation Week, and office retirements, birthdays, weddings and baby showers. How do you choose that perfect gift? How much money are you supposed to put in the envelope? After ten years working in a large office, I've developed some tips to decode the unspoken rules of workplace gift-giving. Who? Your first step is to assess the relationship you have with this person. You may have worked closely with someone for 20 years and play cards with them on the weekend, or you may have to look them up in the company's phone list to know who they are. Someone you are not close with personally might be uncomfortable accepting a more expensive gift from you. It may come across as an attempt to force a more intimate relationship between you, and put the person in a very awkward situation. They have to either return the gift or accept an unsolicited social debt. How Much? Generally, a gift over $50 from an individual to a co-worker, teacher or student is excessive. There may be a workplace where unusually expensive gifts are the norm, but you can find out fairly easily from your co-workers if this is so. In most cases, the following scale applies to gift-giving: $0: If you don't know the person at all and have never interacted with them, it is perfectly acceptable to give nothing. Even though they work at the same company, a total stranger is a total stranger. If the culture in your office makes it a tradition for everyone to give, however, you can choose to throw in a small amount for the sake of good will. $0-$5.00: If your only interaction is to say hello in the hallway, then it is appropriate to give a token gift. This can be a few dollars towards a group gift from the office, or a simply a congratulatory e-mail. This is also a good level for a quick thank-you gift for help on a minor project. $5.00-$10.00: If a person is a co-worker you interact with regularly or have non-work-related exchanges with (i.e. you chat at lunch, or forward the occasional e-mail joke) then stick a few more bucks in the collection envelope, buy them lunch, or spring for a greeting card. If the person is close but will be getting many small gifts, such as a first grade teacher at the end of the school year, then this amount is appropriate for each gift. $10.00-$20.00: If you have a close working relationship with a person, such as a direct supervisor, assistant, or mentor, it calls for you to give a little more. Lean towards the high end of the scale if you are the person's supervisor and/or you make considerably more money than they do, but stay within the bounds so as to not highlight the income disparity. $20.00 to $50.00: A gift for an extraordinary event, such as a thank you gift for a thesis advisor on graduation, or a retirement gift for a long-term boss or assistant with whom you have worked closely. Consider pooling resources with others for a larger group gift, if possible. Of course, if you can honestly not afford to give anything, then you cannot. You can give the gift of time and effort instead, in proportion to the value of the scale above. What? If you know that the person has a specific hobby or interest, take up a collection for a gift card from the group, unless they have specifically requested an item. An outdoor enthusiast, for example, already has plenty of camping supplies in your appropriate price range. An office collection would yield enough to let them buy some specialty item they've been longing for (like a new tent or kyak). Don't contribute to clutter. Avoid decorative items, novelty or gag gifts, and craft items that the person has not actually requested. Look for alternate versions of a gift that prevent clutter, such as a collection of digital photos instead of a framed picture. Give consumables. Lotions, candles, food and drink items, spa certificates, flowers, gift certificates or cards, and similar items show you care without adding clutter to their home. Other options include lunch delivered to their office by a local restaurant, or a gift basket of specialty coffee, fruit, or chocolate. Always check to see if the person has food sensitivities before giving something edible. A treat you can't have is a terrible present. Don't offer food as allergen-free unless you have the training or experience to evaluate whether that food is truly safe. Cross-contamination of allergens is very common in prepared food and can make someone very sick. Give your time. Besides baking or making a gift, there are other gifts of time you can give. A free car detailing, pet-sitting, lawn-mowing, etc. is a great way to give when you have little money, but offers that bring you to someone's home are only appropriate if you already have a personal relationship. To make it less personal, offer to cover their shift, bring them a tasty lunch from home, or tackle their filing backlog. You could also contribute by offering to coordinate the potluck for their office party, or to take up a collection and pass a card for a group gift. When in doubt, a heartfelt and honest note showing your appreciation for what the person does never goes amiss. A casual acquaintance may rate an e-mail, but choose an old fashioned paper card to show thoughtfulness to someone you work closely with. Gift giving can be a high-stakes social event with unspoken rules in an office or school setting. While your particular office culture may have variations you need to know about, in most cases these simple guidelines will let you figure out appropriate levels of gift-giving in the workplace. |
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